Friday, July 30, 2010

I WANT TO BE HAPPY AGAIN

No No don't get me wrong I am happy in my Life, my Marriage, my Family, my Friends, and my Job. The one thing that I am not happy with is ME. I want to love the way I look again. I have never been a girly kind of girl nor a stylish woman. I want that to change I want to loose weight, get the hair style I want, have nice nails, and get a nice wardrobe. I am lucky to know people that I consider stylish and look at as beautiful women. I will be calling upon these women to help me when the time comes to go shopping and tell me the TRUTH when it comes to buying things I need.
Now days I feel flip flops, blue jeans...the only pair I have I can still fit in..and a shirt that hides my stomach is what I need to get by and if you haven't noticed my husband always looks nice..I always feel under dressed when we go places together. I still have things in my closet I had when I was in high school or fresh out of high school. I hate shopping and when I do go shopping I will not venture out of my comfort zone. So I am going to set some goals for myself (weight wise) and when I meet my goal it will be time to turn myself over to the lovely ladies I look up to and want to dress like. I will have the money I plan to spend and I will be at there mercy. Just be gentle ladies and don't take no for an answer fashion me up!! It will be nice to feel like a lady.

Money Not My Happy Place

Alright I don't do this. I don't talk about finances with people, friends, or family (Except my Husband). I don't do it because I am ashamed of what we do or do not have but because I don't want people to fill bad for me or want to fix my problem. I want to fix it! If I let people bail me out every time something goes wrong I will never learn and never fix my problem. Having Porter has made me open my eyes a little wider and think about him growing up and how I want him to be able to look at the way we live and the way we handle finances and want fallow our lead. I want to be able to buy him a car when he needs it for his first job and not have to barrow money for it. I want to build my dream house on our multi acre land and be able to pay for most of it up front. I have started listening to auto books while working and the first book I just finished is Dave Ramsey The Total Money Makeover. 
 I feel 100% better already about the process we are about to embark on. I know that if we stick to the plan I have drawn up we will be debt free (except for our home) in about a YEAR AND A HALF. I want to get more people I know into this plan so that we will not be alone in our success to LOSE OUR DEBT. I get more and more confident in this program the more I look at the 2 spread sheets I have made. Now all I need to do is get Damon as excited as I am. It is hard to think that we will have to give up alot for now.. no eating out.. no buying gadgets we don't need but if we do it just for a little while we will be there be for you know it and will be stress free to top it all off. O to not have to worry about bills because you are living a month behind if not 2 so you are pre paying things not worrying if it got paid or slipped your mind. Tomarrow I am staring my next Dave Ramsey book Financial Peace University. I am excited to start it and hope I learn even more to apply to our finances. 


Damon and I are still working with our mortgage company to get some things straight and it is not said weather we are going to loose our house or not yet. We haven't caught up from when we were both out of work but hope to get things back in order and back on track if our mortgage company doesn't go through with the foreclosure like they said they were going to. I know we will be ok no matter what but I know after this foreclosure stuff is over I will feel a lot better.